With the comedy classes I've been taking, I've started thinking about a stand up routine. It's a ways off, but in terms of material I keep going back to the same little piece of my life. Which leads me to admit something I've been keeping from you. I've had an online dating profile for about a year now on Okcupid. What can I say. It's free. My friend Colleen talked me into it.
Online dating is great. Everyone who browses me thinks I look like this:
I've only met a few guys in person. They're pleasant enough. That's where I found my friend Allen. But I've found that the real magic tends to happens online, during the initial messaging period.
I'd like to share a conversation I'm particularly fond of. I call this vignette "Well Proportioned."
The following conversation occurred as emails over a three day period.
Boy_man: Hi! You are gorgeous and your writing is hilarious. Height is important to me - what ya got? :)
Melina: 4 feet two inches. I'm technically a midget but I prefer little person.
Boy_man: Wow, you are incredibly well proportioned, I figured you were 5'4".
Melina: I am actually 5 3. I was just kidding about being a midget.
Boy_man: Still think you're well proportioned, but I'm still into taller girls. Why don't you list your height? Makes me think there's something fishy going on, such as midget hood.
Melina: Understood. I liked your profile too, but I was a little concerned that you didn't list your penis size? What's going on there?
Online dating is great. Everyone who browses me thinks I look like this:
I've only met a few guys in person. They're pleasant enough. That's where I found my friend Allen. But I've found that the real magic tends to happens online, during the initial messaging period.
I'd like to share a conversation I'm particularly fond of. I call this vignette "Well Proportioned."
The following conversation occurred as emails over a three day period.
Boy_man: Hi! You are gorgeous and your writing is hilarious. Height is important to me - what ya got? :)
Melina: 4 feet two inches. I'm technically a midget but I prefer little person.
Boy_man: Wow, you are incredibly well proportioned, I figured you were 5'4".
Melina: I am actually 5 3. I was just kidding about being a midget.
Boy_man: Still think you're well proportioned, but I'm still into taller girls. Why don't you list your height? Makes me think there's something fishy going on, such as midget hood.
Melina: Understood. I liked your profile too, but I was a little concerned that you didn't list your penis size? What's going on there?
*****
It was a colorful and spirited interaction, but neither Boy_man nor I felt the need to meet in person. And that concludes my first story about online dating.